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My 5 years of college life is over and with it ,are a few
more myths about the world..myths that I considered realistic during my
formative years. And one among them is something that changed the very
foundation of my approach towards
relationships. Its called “unconditional love”
My first year –
everything is fresh and beautiful and everything was hopeful and possible.
Human connections, my usual specialty worked
in many favorable ways . I move along very easily and happily around people.
People being my batchmates, friends and family that I stayed in touch every day.
Things started to change over the years..my internship being the crowning
glory.
My first myth—as
long as I smiled and said yes unconditionally to every need of the people
around me,I would be loved and would be recognized
as a very good person who makes everyone
happy( which I pathetically admit..happy to see others happy ..sometimes
even at the expense of my self-esteem)….
Second myth—your friends would never take advantage
of the loopholes in your stupid people pleasing character. When you show them
how much you love them by spending or helping out,they would see your ‘heart’ rather
than the money or ultimate consequence behind it.
Third myth— worry
free ,non-egoistic,open minded relationships that I had at my schooling would
extend smoothly thru my college too. Not thinking about who takes out the money
from their pockets first ..be it at the cinemas or a road side bajji shop,never
finding hidden meanings to every
conversation that we had, not minding how every individual thinks about your
group of friends ‘cause there never existed groups…likewise. Basically thinking
life and relationships are easy to handle as long as you are ‘pure’ of body and
soul.
Oh this one I definitely
gotta mention. My fourth myth is that raising your helping hand to every
hopeless situation meant that I should act humane and responsible for anyone in
trouble and never think about consequences or return-backs. That would be
totally selfish of me if I don’t even try.(Ohhh should tell you..this myth is
totally extinct. I mean totally)
Fifth myth—my personal
special! Money DOESN’T make many things. Atleast in my world it doesn’t. I was
brought up with great values on that category—courtesy of my dad. For me,
people matter,their unique characters and happiness mattered rather than petty green paper. AND this one just blinded
me so much with its blow of non-existense(it must have been extinct before the
T-rex did) that it took months..actually still taking to adjust my moral base.
There are few
more notable myths of my crazy mind..
·
Respecting your friends’ opinion even when you know it’s the dumbest one you have ever heard.
·
Burying your own tiny wishes and enduring a
little pain for your good friend is the best way to show your gratitude for
their friendship
·
I would never utter my problems or sickness to
my friends or family…ignorance is a bliss! They would be happier if I just
acted happy…
·
And hoping and hoping among all this,that one
single person might really notice when you are crying in and smiling out..this
is is the only reciprocation I would want of a good friend.
Well that was a very few..
. I sometimes used to be so frustrated when
thinking, why a lot of things happened as it did..I was the one who thought
everything is simple and lovely..when the hell did everything get so
complicated! …
As I see now, I see people focusing on what they want for themselves
rather than for a greater good.. ‘Taking advantage’ is not a small word in my
dictionary anymore. I have been increasingly recognizing every event of my life
when I was treated as a doormat to many
,in the name of being a relative,friend or a batchmate. That my profound stupidity
of trusting everyone paid me big slaps by the end of the years…and the worst of
all the thoughts that I got was that,’even my best of friends were around me
just because I made them comfortable by saying yes in every situation”..accctually
I feel that I deserved all this for being
highy imaginative of life.!And im not in moaning right now..’cause I have few
of the best humans as my friends who I can trust without being scared of a snap
again. Disclaimer for fairy tale endings was rewritten in a bitter way.(‘Should
mention this too..old habits die hard’..even when you get punched between your
eyes)
Well enough of all the cynical part of it..i did earn a lot of good
deeds too.
Hundreds of conversation with thousands of strangers (patients and
public) just made my philosophical and mental strength stronger.. it’s the lives
of some people that can change your opinion on the way to live your own life..
from getting the best motivational speech from a transgender female in a train
to the most intellectual young auto driver …those endless complaints and
worries of your patients and helping out
a drugged guy lying on a road… limitless incidents of my independent stay…just
made me a better person than being cynical and self-obsessed. Being on your own
might change your life in many ways..it all comes to your own morals . I conclude
with an absolute truth understood from
my college life..
We are living in a time where everyone has turned into COMMENSALS
..sucking each other’s blood for existence. In the yester-years, they would say
a girl/a boy is known to be good or bad by his family background and brought up.
But I can strongly say that this isn’t even a % close to being true. The present
generation ,leading their lives away from their families are mostly moulded by
the society and by their own CONSCIOUS. Being morally strong and well behaved has more to do with their experiences and
exposure rather than what their parents have imparted from their childhood. There
is no discretion in behavior according to any caste/religion but by their
various shades of perception of this ever changing world.
Anyone
claiming otherwise is just fooling themselves…!
