5 YEARS OF COLLEGE and the extinction of few old myths

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My 5 years of college life is over and with it ,are a few more myths about the world..myths that I considered realistic during my formative years. And one among them is something that changed the very foundation of my approach  towards relationships. Its called “unconditional love”

     My first year – everything is fresh and beautiful and everything was hopeful and possible. Human connections, my usual specialty worked  in many favorable ways . I move along very easily and happily around people. People being my batchmates, friends and family that I stayed in touch every day. Things started to change over the years..my internship being the crowning glory.

       My first myth—as long as I smiled and said yes unconditionally to every need of the people around me,I would be loved and  would be recognized as a very good person  who makes everyone happy( which I pathetically admit..happy to see others happy ..sometimes even  at the expense of my self-esteem)….

      Second myth—your friends would never take advantage of the loopholes in your stupid people pleasing character. When you show them how much you love them by spending or helping out,they would see your ‘heart’ rather than the money or ultimate consequence behind it.

      Third myth— worry free ,non-egoistic,open minded relationships that I had at my schooling would extend smoothly thru my college too. Not thinking about who takes out the money from their pockets first ..be it at the cinemas or a road side bajji shop,never finding hidden  meanings to every conversation that we had, not minding how every individual thinks about your group of friends ‘cause there never existed groups…likewise. Basically thinking life and relationships are easy to handle as long as you are ‘pure’ of body and soul.

       Oh this one I definitely gotta mention. My fourth  myth  is that raising your helping hand to every hopeless situation meant that I should act humane and responsible for anyone in trouble and never think about consequences or return-backs. That would be totally selfish of me if I don’t even try.(Ohhh should tell you..this myth is totally extinct. I mean totally)

       Fifth myth—my personal special! Money DOESN’T make many things. Atleast in my world it doesn’t. I was brought up with great values on that category—courtesy of my dad. For me, people matter,their unique characters and happiness mattered  rather than  petty green paper. AND this one just blinded me so much with its blow of non-existense(it must have been extinct before the T-rex did) that it took months..actually still taking to adjust my moral base.  

      There are few more notable myths of my crazy mind..

·         Respecting your friends’ opinion even  when you  know it’s the dumbest one you have ever heard.

·         Burying your own tiny wishes and enduring a little pain for your good friend is the best way to show your gratitude for their friendship

·         I would never utter my problems or sickness to my friends or family…ignorance is a bliss! They would be happier if I just acted happy…

·         And hoping and hoping among all this,that one single person might really notice when you are crying in and smiling out..this is is the only reciprocation I would want of a good friend.

          Well that was a very few..

. I sometimes used to be so frustrated when thinking, why a lot of things happened as it did..I was the one who thought everything is simple and lovely..when the hell did everything get so complicated! …

         As I see now, I see people focusing on what they want for themselves rather than for a greater good.. ‘Taking advantage’ is not a small word in my dictionary anymore. I have been increasingly recognizing every event of my life when  I was treated as a doormat to many ,in the name of being a relative,friend or a batchmate. That my profound stupidity of trusting everyone paid me big slaps by the end of the years…and the worst of all the thoughts that I got was that,’even my best of friends were around me just because I made them comfortable by saying yes in every situation”..accctually I  feel that I deserved all this for being highy imaginative of life.!And im not in moaning right now..’cause I have few of the best humans as my friends who I can trust without being scared of a snap again. Disclaimer for fairy tale endings was rewritten in a bitter way.(‘Should mention this too..old habits die hard’..even when you get punched between your eyes)

         Well enough of all the cynical part of it..i did earn a lot of good deeds too.

       Hundreds of conversation with thousands of strangers (patients and public) just made my philosophical and mental strength stronger.. it’s the lives of some people that can change your opinion on the way to live your own life.. from getting the best motivational speech from a transgender female in a train to the most intellectual young auto driver …those endless complaints and worries  of your patients and helping out a drugged guy lying on a road… limitless incidents of my independent stay…just made me a better person than being cynical and self-obsessed. Being on your own might change your life in many ways..it all comes to your own morals . I conclude with an absolute truth  understood from my college life..

      We are living in a time where everyone has turned into COMMENSALS ..sucking each other’s blood for existence. In the yester-years, they would say a girl/a boy is known to be good or bad by his family background and brought up. But I can strongly say that this isn’t even a % close to being true. The present generation ,leading their lives away from their families are mostly moulded by the society and by their own CONSCIOUS. Being morally strong and well behaved  has more to do with their experiences and exposure rather than what their parents have imparted from their childhood. There is no discretion in behavior according to any caste/religion but by their various shades of perception of this ever changing world.

    Anyone claiming otherwise is just fooling themselves…!